Sensation Play - a SHAG Mini-Workshop - PART 1

January 26, 2022

Sensation Play - a SHAG Mini-Workshop - PART 1

Hosted by Dirty Lola
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Welcome, everybody. I am Dirty Lola.

What is sensation play? Sensation play is basically a gateway into different kinds of kinks. It often involves removing one sense – sight, for example! - to heighten the other senses. In that case, you would likely want some kind of eye covering like a classic blindfold or something simple like a scarf or necktie. We have a wonderful sash here at SHAG that can also be used as wrist binders or ankle binders. During sensation play, covering the eyes is generally a way to enhance sensations, but removing sight can also function to ease apprehension, because when you're trying new things, especially kinky things, sometimes things can look a little terrifying. If you tense up because of something in your line of sight, or you're just not open to the experience, that tension may ruin the experience for you. Whereas if you are open, waiting, and unsure about what's coming, you may just start feeling the sensations in a way that lets you sink into it a bit more and enjoy the moment.

Let’s talk about the basics of setting up the sensation play: as mentioned, you're often, though not always, going to want a blindfold. You do want to make sure it fits. It doesn't have to be too snug, although if you're going for sensory deprivation, you want something very snug around the eyes, so the person wearing the eye covering can only see darkness. The more that the eye covering eliminates light and visuals, the more potential it has to heighten everything you're feeling, hearing, and so forth. Another option is to use earplugs with or instead of the eye cover, if you want to shut out sound. Some people love that. Some people hate that. Personally, I like a good sexy playlist as another layer to aid in eliminating extraneous sounds and helping someone stay in the moment. So, you might want to consider either ear plugs or a good playlist. Some of the candles we sell here at SHAG come with a playlist! You can scan the QR code and up pops a playlist to match the scent, which is so cool. Besides sight and sound, if you want to add another whole layer to the sensation play, you can play with restraints and limiting the sense of touch by restricting movement. Being restrained can mean experiencing touch sensory input only when your partner provides it.

In terms of how to restrain someone, well you can tie someone in all the ways! There are a lot of options. One popular option is to concentrate on the wrists and have them put their hands over their head, for example. We do have many different kinds of cuffs. Some folks feel iffy about cuffs with buckles because they're like, “What if I need to get away?” I always say, “Well, just make sure you're with somebody that you trust.” That said, no one wants to get trapped in the bed handcuffed! (And you should never leave someone tied up without a way out while you leave the premises – in case of emergency!) All of these concerns make Velcro a really nice option, especially for beginners. It’s really easy to use, super soft, and, of course, you can fiddle your way out of Velcro restraints, no problem!

Another option is an under-bed restraint. These go between your box spring and your mattress. The weight of the mattress holds the restraints in place. With this particular set, you get six restraint points. We also have the more classic style in which you get four restraint points. These systems give you a way to hook up someone’s arms and legs, as well as do any binding, and also move around the bed so you can reach different positions easily. If you don't have a headboard – I know many of us do not in New York because our apartments are small – then this is a great option. This way you can easily move somebody around the bed, even in a small space. If you want them half off the bed and half on the bed, under-bed restraints are great for that. Because you're restricting movement, you are further intensifying the sensations – your partner literally cannot roll away from the sensation or reach out for more. They have to ride it out and feel what you provide, which can mean fun wriggling or something more intense. This is just one reason why it is always important before your scene starts to have a nice safe word conversation.

For those who are not familiar with the term, a safe word is a word that you pick, usually in lieu of “stop” or other verbal protests, to indicate clearly that you are not playing along with the scene but really need something to slow or stop. I like colors as safe words, because they are really clear. You can use stoplight colors like red, yellow, and green, which allow you to check in and give positive feedback as well. Green means: “I'm good.” Yellow indicates: “I like this, but it's a little too much. Slow down.” Red, of course, is: “Stop.” But if you want to have a safe word instead of the stoplight system, something like, for example, “palomino” is great – you want it to be something you don't normally say. I would caution against using something that is an inside joke, because that leaves room for miscommunication. If you're referencing an inside joke with your safe word, there’s a risk that your partner is just going to laugh and keep going, rather than understand that you are indeed saying “stop.”

Of course, another restriction you can play with, to intensify sensations, is removing the ability to talk! Let’s say you have a mouthy person and you both decide you want to stop them from talking during play, because you want them to stay in the moment rather than being chatty, which can be a tactic to escape intense sensations or diffuse built up tension. In that case, using a ball gag is a great solution. I like this one because it's got holes in it. Sometimes people instinctively fight because they want to breathe through their mouth, but when they find it blocked, they panic. The holes ensure the wearer can breathe through their mouth, but the gag still results in all the yummy drool, which is why a lot of people like mouth gags. Besides ball style gags, there are o-ring style gags. With the o-ring gags, you can do oral sex stuff with the gag in place, because it keeps the mouth open. Keep in mind that if you are going to play with gags, you should pick a non-verbal safety/stop cue, like three taps in a row, or a specific verbal but non-word safety cue, like shaking the head and making the noise “uh uh uh” three times through the gag. Talk it over before play and be specific! You certainly don't have to use any mouth gags for sensation play if you do not want to. There are so many options to set up a sensation play scene. You can just do the blindfold, or just start with the blindfold, and then layer on more as you explore. I like starting out with maybe just the blindfold and then slowly layer on restrictions, taking things away one by one, like movement, and then sound, and so forth.

**This text was transcribed from SHAG’s live Mini-Workshop on January 26, 2022 and edited for clarity. This opinion piece is not intended to constitute licensed expert advice; all content is for general informational purposes only.**